"There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under the jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select what I can read and eat and study. I can choose how I'm going to regard unfortunate circumstances in my life - whether I will see them as curses or opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts."
--Elizabeth Gilbert
It seems as though I have tried this blog thing before, but hopefully, this time, it will be something that I will be able to stick with. Sticking with things is sometimes an issue for me (for those of you who aren't aware, I have adult ADHD, and have grown up with ADHD before it was cool, heh.) Really, though, there is so much that I want to say in a day's time, that it seems logical to me, that I should put it all down in a blog so that I can go back and review these thoughts and ideas later in time, and either say, "hey, that was really good", or "really - what was I thinking?"
Let me start out by telling you, how very blessed I am to have such amazing people in my life. True, there have been some who have fallen by the wayside, or chosen to take a different path - but that is simply called, life. I've always subscribed to the thought that each of us are where we are, for a reason. We don't always know what that reason is, but it's always there. Maybe we'll never know. Maybe it just isn't something we need to know. Maybe I am rambling. Where was I? Oh yes, blessed. I am! I have such wonderful friends and family, both on SL and in RL, that I can't begin to name everyone. There are some, though, that touch my life in ways that no one else could ever begin to.
My beloved Master ... Where to even start? Since "day dot", You have been there for me - even before You wrapped me in Your protection against the cruelties that I was facing. You listened to me cry and rail against things, and You tried to shelter me from those things as best You could. Then, when the time was right, You took me as Your own ... not only Your submissive, but as Your partner, loving me so completely in both lives that it sometimes still makes my head spin. There are some people out there that say some pretty hateful things, but anyone who truly knows the man that You are, could never believe them. You are the kindest, most gentle man that I have ever chanced to meet, and the words "I love You" don't even seem to do justice to the feelings that I have for You.
My Sister in All But Blood - Jynxx ... We go back to before the age of dinosaurs, you and I. Back to the days of dial-up, and actual RP on AOL. (Is that even around anymore?? LOL) You hated me, I didn't like you overly much, and it was all Adam's fault. (Seriously, it was, and not for the reasons anyone might think!) Over the past 10+ years, we have gotten closer and closer, and really, what is there between us other than a few pesky states, now? You always tell me what I need to hear, even if I don't want to hear it. I almost always appreciate it later, by the way. And, your impending visit is making me go out and buy a coffee maker. So, I guess, you aren't all that bad. ;)
The Little Sis I Never Had - SydnEmeraldNannas ... This is the little sis I always and never wanted to have. The one that I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, would be stealing my clothes and driving me absolutely crazy! But, that's okay, because I love her, and anyone who messes with her, other than Jynxx or Master, has me to answer to! Why, you ask? Because it's okay for me to get pissed off at her and do some ranting and raving, because she's my little sis. But let anyone else do it, and guess what? Hell to pay, that's right.
My Exiled Family ... So many of you that I can't name you all. We came together from all over SL, to form this wonderful place together, and it ain't been easy at all. There's been some who want to destroy things, but as long as we stick together, then nothing can touch this beautiful place we call "home". Exile is not about the building, or about pictures on the walls, or about toys or dungeons or dance floors. Exile is about the PEOPLE, the very souls that walk through the doors, the voices that reach out and say hello, and the need and want to make new friends, to bring them into the fold and family. To be an Exile isn't a colour or an attitude, or a role or orientation. It isn't about Dominance or submission, and it isn't about who you know. To be an Exile means ... family. It's just that simple. I sincerely hope that I make each of you feel as warm and fuzzy as you do for me. To the ones who want to cause drama and try to destroy what we have here - I say to you - go for your lives. Because, at the end of the day, we are STILL Exiles, and we will ALWAYS be Exiles. Exile, the place, could cease to exist, and all of that would still be true, in our hearts, and that is something that you can NEVER take away.
I've been around SL a year or so ... well, actually, since 2007. Sure, there's people who have been around longer than I have. Sure, there's people who have more experience with things than I do. But, no two experiences are ever the same. No two truths are ever the same. No two people are ever the same. That said, I would take the time to urge each and every one of you, to not judge people based on the stories of others, in the same way that you would not want to be judged based on what someone may say about you. Take the time to get to know people. Find out about them, who they really are ... discover hopes and dreams. In that, know that there will always be those people who are so miserable, in themselves, that they would say and/or do anything to bring others down to their level of unhappiness - why? Because misery loves company. But when they send those harsh words against you, just remember - you have the choice as to whether they are going to stick to you, and cause you to feel less than you really are, or whether those words are going to slide off of you and lay in a puddle on the floor. Offer compassion in that, you don't know what is going on in that person's life. People reflect what they are feeling. If someone shoots words of unworthiness to you ... perhaps they are only feeling unworthy, themselves. I think those are some of the most important things that I have learned in the past 6 years of SL.
I'll leave off with that, and head into the world of slumber and dreams. You know ... that place between dreaming and waking ... where I'll always be thinking of you. :)
Night,
~R
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